Can we tell the difference
between Whole Foods and the 99 Cent Store? Let’s talk about that.( music playing )Good Mythical morning! Today I’mma be guessing
the popularity of some of the dumbest
celebrity tweets of all time and watching Rhett eat
an entire can of beans. Hey. But first, Whole Foods is
a great place to buy groceries if you want to shop
farm to table, but given their prices,
it also means you’ll be living – hand to mouth.
– Uh-huh. They pride themselves
on having healthy food
that’s organic. They’ve got vegan food,
gluten-free food, dairy-free food,
they’ve got food with no GMOs. And the 99 Cent Store… has food that’s 99 cents. But can anyone
really tell the difference? It’s time for…( howls )Here’s how it works. We’re going to be presented
with two identical meals that we are going to taste. One dish is prepared
entirely from ingredients from Whole Foods, the other one with
ingredients entirely acquired from the 99 Cent Store. We have to decide
which is which by placing the flags… – Yes.
– …on them. And whoever has the most
right at the end wins a very special treat from the 99 Cent Store. Let’s do this. These cobb salads
in front of us right now look pretty much identical. I mean, at first glance. But one of them costs
just under three dollars the other one
just under nine dollars, so there’s a six-dollar
difference here that my naked eye
is not telling me. The Whole Foods one
is more expensive. Yeah. Uh, now, typically,
when I eat a cobb salad, which I do order quite a bit, I– I do the old mixaroony, but I feel like that’s
gonna cause me to not be able
to taste as well. I’m just gonna grab
a few ingredients here. A little bit of blue cheese
’cause I don’t love that, but I gotta have
a little bit of sauce, little bit of dressing. Throw that on there. That was good.
I think it’s the ham that’s gonna
help me out here. The little ham help? The ham. You wanna get
a little ham help. You put ham– you’ve soiled
the blue cheese on this side with your ham. Mm. I feel like the plate
in front of you, the bacon was better. The ham– let me look at
some more of that ham. They’re both really good.
I mean, right off the bat– There’s no difference. It’s been a while since I’ve
been in the 99 Cent Store, and I didn’t know they added
produce to the list, but it’s working well. This is difficult. I am ultimately gonna go with that being Whole Foods because the bacon tasted
a little better. You’re disagreeing with me. I’m disagreeing with you because I feel like just the overall appearance– Everything seems
a little bit fresher and a little bit newer
on this side. – Link: Mm-hm.
– Stevie:Okay, guys.The Whole Foods dish
is on Rhett’s side.– Ah! You’re right, Link.
– I was correct. Okay, to clarify, this is not like
frozen burrito. Tess made these
out of the ingredients from these places. So they look
exactly the same. One of them’s two bucks,
just under it, and one of them’s $5.70. So we’re talking 3.70
difference here. We’re gonna go
with this one first? – Man…
– And I think the– – …it looks so tasty.
– It does look– I like a good breakfast burrito.
You want salsa? ‘Cause if I do salsa
and you don’t do salsa – and we dink,
we both get salsa.
– I’m doing salsa. So if we both do salsa
and then we dink,
we both have salsa. – It’s okay.
– Oh, well, then go– go– It’s okay. I can give you salsa
through a dink, or we can just get– Go ham on the salsa,
and then dink it. Yeah, and then smush it. You don’t have enough salsa.
I’ll give you some more. – Okay? Okay?
– That should be good. – Get my own doggone salsa.
– Oh, gosh, we shouldn’t
have done that. Okay. – Man…
– Good morning. – That’s good.
– I have to stop myself from just immediately
eating this whole thing. Mm-hm.
Grab one of these. You wanna do
the same thing? No, let’s just do
the old fashioned way. I’m just gonna take
all the salsa. Every man should get
his own salsa. Now… I don’t mean
to help you out here, but I think
it’s the salsa that’s gonna help us
figure this out because the salsa
is a prepared thing, or did you make the salsa
from scratch?No, the salsa is not made
from scratch.–That’s as much
as I’m going to tell you.
– The salsa is also bought – from the store.
–( Stevie laughs )– Hm.
– Hm. This is a chunkier,
spicier salsa. The burrito
tastes the same. Which one’s my burrito? ‘Cause I gotta go back in
for second-zies. That one. Golly. I just like eating. I remember that
every time I eat. I remember how much I like
eating when I eat. Yeah, at least three times
a day. Um, I have
a sneaking suspicion that this one over here
in front of me
is from Whole Foods. Man, you know what, Link? I’m seeing things differently
than you today. $3.70– – You were right last time.
– …difference. I just–
I enjoy this one more, so I’m just assuming
it’s the more expensive one.Okay, the Whole Foods dish
is on… Link’s side.Whoa-ho!
You’re on a roll, Link! Now,
I’m not happy to be losing, but I’m happy
to be learning that the 99 Cent Store brings the frickin’ heat. I mean,
how are they doing this? Well, you also get someone
who knows what they’re doing
to prepare it. So if you’re crappy
at making things, they’ll both
be crappy equally. Oops. Dink it. Little rice. – Hm.
– That tastes good. – Eh. It tastes okay to me.
– Doesn’t taste great. I’m trying to get the same
ratios of everything. Basically the same bite. Oh, gosh, I’m having trouble
recreating that bite.Make sure you get
some chicken.Oh, I’m gettin’
some chicken. That chicken’s good. – Wow.
– There’s something
a little funky about that one. To me, it’s coming down
to the sauce, and I think this sauce
is a little better, a little more high dollar. We’re talking 2.50 vs. $6, so there’s not
a big difference here, but still
I’m discerning that this is the Whole Foods
in front of me. That’s what I’m saying. – You know what?
– What do you think? I feel differently. I mean, this has been wrong
every time. Stick with it. But I’m gonna
keep rolling with it. Yeah.
All right, Stevie.The Whole Foods dish
is on Rhett’s side.Ooh. So did I get it right?You got it right.One of these sandwiches
costs 70 cents, 70 cents worth
of ingredients, the other one, $3.60. Huh. I’m making observations
about the bread. I’m making observations
about the ham. This bread is tighter, tight– it’s a tight– you know, less bu– This, big bubbles, but which one’s worse? – And that ham–
– Who knows? This ham is
a little more marbly. That ham seems
a little more unison–
uniform. I like the way you arranged
both sandwiches out.Thank you, chef.This is like my school lunch
come flooding back to me – like paper– paper bag.
– I had a lot of these. – Man, it’s so uniform.
– Biting right in the middle. Did I get a little
on my face? – No. Yeah.
– You didn’t either. – You did.
– ( laughter ) Okay, so there’s
that one. Here you go.
Grab one of these. Actually,
just bite that one again. Are you handing it to me
or are you… Feeding it to you. – I’ll grab my own.
– Okay. ( mocking )
“I’ll grab my own.” – I grab my own sandwich.
– Okay, here we go. I’m going for the corner
this time. – Mm.
– That right there. This is a better sandwich. I don’t know why.
I can’t tell you why. It is a better sandwich. I think the cheese
is better. I’m gonna have to agree
with you on this one, Link. We are finally
in alignment, which means we’re both
probably wrong. Stevie?And you’re both wrong.The Whole Foods dish
is on Rhett’s side.– Really?
– What? 70-cent sandwich.
Don’t– Don’t overpay for
a ham sandwich any longer! One of these made-from-scratch
clam chowder bowls cost 20 bucks. Dang, Whole Foods. And the other one costs
almost seven bucks. This is a $13
discrepancy here. This should be obvious. You would think. But so far it has not been. And they do not look
any different. You know what?
You could serve this
to the queen. You know what I’m saying? – That’s a good show.
– Is she coming over? Those Brits,
they like that kind of thing, serving cheap food
to the queen. They’d love that.
They’d put it on the BBC and the next thing you know,
we’d be wanting one. “Queen eats 99-Cent food.” Every time y’all put something
on the BBC, we gotta have that, too. Ain’t nothing
to complain about. But is there anything
to rave about? Doesn’t taste
like a $20 bowl of soup. No. Maybe this one would. You using the same spoon? Or, sorry. I double dipped? I have a different spoon
for sanitary reasons– Thanks for not
double dipping. …and also to help
my guessing. But I guess you’re not abiding
by that rule. Oh, gosh,
I’m gonna have to make the– I’m making the big move. This is difficult. At first it tastes
no different, and then afterward it tastes
a little different. Man, I just feel like I’m
flipping a coin at this point. I think that one tastes better for reasons
that make it cheaper. – Link–
– I’m a believer
in the 99 Cent Store. I am, too. The queen
would never know. But I just–
I have a sense I have a sense. Stevie.Okay, the Whole Foods dishis on Link’s side.I was wrong. Okay, make a wish. We gotta blow
these things out. Should we sing first? – ♪ Happy birth– ♪
– ♪ First ♪ ( laughter ) Is that what you meant? Oh, such a–
such a gentle blow. I’m trying not to spit
on the cake. I respect that.
I respect that. Now, right off the bat– I’m– I gotta wish. Oh. Should I have wished
before I blew? – Yeah.
– I blew it, okay. I wish that I won,
but I can’t now. ‘Cause I’m down so much. Sprinklers here are much bigger
than these sprinkles. – Yes, uh–
– I said “sprinklers.” Who cares? Now, so you gotta
ask yourself, what’s
the cheaper sprinkle? You know?
Is it bigger and brighter? This feels a little froufrou, like the people at Whole Foods
were like, “We can’t do the the really
bright, big sprinkles.” – This is more refined.
– “Ooh!” There’s a $20 difference here
almost, though. – So one of these–
– Yeah, 20– One of them is $28
and one of them is 7.41. Um– we gotta taste it. It’s just not about looking
at sprinkles all day. You starting here? How are we gonna do this? You know, the way I always
eat a cake. You just stick a fork in it
and start eating. Ooh, that is a thick cake. That’s a sign.
Isn’t it? Isn’t that a sign? It is a har– that was
a hard cake to get into. – Oh, gosh.
– Here you go. ( raspy voice )
Here you go. Um… Huh. Hm. The sprinkles are–
it’s like eating dirt. It’s very gritty. Yeah, it’s like you dropped
the cake in the sand. – Yes.
– “Eat it, kids! We didn’t come out here to celebrate your friggin’
seven-year-old party…” “For you to refuse
to eat your cake.” “So you could drop
the frickin’– You dropped it in the sand,
you eat it!” That was what my seventh
birthday was like. I’m still recovering. Ooh, much softer. But is soft better? That’s the question. – Oh, so easy.
– Earthquake. So easy to get
into this cake. – Oh.
– That is a– It’s a totally
different thing. It’s like
a angel food cake. Mm, it’s better, too. – Mm.
– This is like
my eighth birthday party where I didn’t
drop the cake. Mm-hm. Whole Foods don’t know nothin’
about sweets. You can’t make something
unhealthy healthy, or organic or expensive, and it be better. You know what, Link? I’m almost sure
that you’re correct, but just so I can make up
a point, or go deeper in the hole,
I’m going to be different. – So you think this might be
–Okay.All right.The Whole Foods cake
is on Link’s side.Yep! Yes! Congratulations, Link.
You can have that whole cake. – I’m gonna have this one.
– I don’t want it, but I won a special prize
from the 99 Cent Store. “Not my”– “Not My Day poop emoji.” Congratulations to Link, and congratulations
to the freakin’ 99 Cent Store. Do all your shopping there. Not a sponsor.
We just love ’em. These poop emojis
actually taste like cola. – I’m a little disappointed.
– Sorry. Next up, you’ve never seen
someone eat a can of beans like this before. It’s me.
I’m eating the beans. Link:It’s Monday and you know
what that means:a new episode of our podcast
“Ear Biscuits”is available on Apple Podcastor wherever you