Only Stone Age Kids Remember This


At this moment you could be anywhere, doing anything. Instead you sit alone before a screen. Hey, that’s cheating. The only way we can watch this is on a screen. So what’s stopping us from doing what we want, being where we wanna be? I have school. Also even if I didn’t, I like being where I am now just fine. There’s not much I can do elsewhere that I can’t do here. Each day we wake up in the same room- Not if you had a good time the night before UP TOP! … up top… … up top. -and follow the same path, to live the same day as yesterday. Yet at one time, each day was a new adventure. Yeah, each day something different was trying to kill you. Along the way something changed. Yeah, when exactly was that? Because this video makes it really hard to tell what exactly you’re comparing “the modern day” to. Like some things you say make it sound like you’re comparing us to the 90s, and other things make it sound like you’re comparing us to the Stone Age. Before, our days were timeless. No, the Sun still set. We still had nighttime. Now our days are scheduled. Is this what it means to be grown up? To actually put some planning into what you do instead of just waltzing around aimlessly? Yeah. To be free? But are we really free? Bruh. Food, water, land, KATARA:
Long ago, the Four Nations lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Fire Nation attacked. The very elements we need to survive are owned by corporations. Yeah, and you can buy those things from corporations and then you’ll have them! There’s no food for us on trees, That really depends on which trees. I guarantee you if you take a trip into the woods right now, the trees there will have just as much food on them as they always have. Good luck picking the fruit that isn’t poisonous, though. Are you talking about trees on sidewalks? Is that it, you’re just mad you can’t walk into Central Park and pick an apple off a tree and feed your family with it? Start a garden in your backyard if you care so much. no fresh water in streams, no land to build a home There’s no land to build a home because we already built homes on all the land. You don’t need to build a home you can buy one pre-built. Don’t even have to pay for it all at once. And they’re up to code too. You don’t have worry about your roof collapsing on your head in an earthquake because you don’t know how to build a home. If you try and take what the earth provides you’ll be locked away. Start. A. Garden. So we obey their rules. Look buddy, if you wanna walk into the middle of traffic, I’m not gonna stop you. But I think you’re gonna have a lot more on your hands to deal with than the law at that point. We discover the world through a textbook. Textbooks have a lot of information in them, they’re pretty good things to learn from. For years we sit and regurgitate what we’re told, tested and graded, like subjects in a lab. Or like students in a school. Or potential employees at a job interview. Or patients in a doctor’s office. Lab subjects aren’t the only ones who get tested. Raised not to make a difference in this world. Raised to be no different. Yeah, that’s why colleges have different majors. Now, if you’re talking about grade school, it’s a little more understandable, since we all get taught the same thing. Mostly; there’s electives. But I still wouldn’t call that, “Raised to be no different.” The main four subjects they teach us are math, science, English, and history. If you actually form a career off of one of those, you’d be a mathematician, a scientist, a writer, or a historian. I’d hardly call those run of the mill jobs. If we were really being “raised not to make a difference,” you’d think we would be getting taught things like, “How to Sit in a Cubicle All Day 101” Not only that, but they are constantly hounding you to think about your future, to an annoying extent sometimes. They have guidance counselors with the specific job to help you plan for your future Hell, they even have career days. Smart enough to do our job, but not to question why we do it. MR KRABS:
Money! So we work and work, left with no time to live the life we work for. Geez man, when do you get off work? Most people get out at like five, that pretty much gives you your whole evening to yourself. Do you not get weekends off? Most people get weekends off. Until a day comes when we are too old to do our job. It is here we’re left to die. That’s a cemetery. You’re not left to die at a cemetery, they put you there when you’re already dead. You know we’ve been burying our dead for a while now, that’s not a new phenomenon. Our children take our place in the game. Your children don’t have to get the same job you had. To us, our path is unique, but together we are nothing more than fuel. Well what difference does it make what we are, if we still get to forge our own paths? Sounds pretty ideal to me. We get to do what we want *and* we contribute to something bigger? The fuel that powers the elite. The elite who hide behind the logos of corporations. IDIOTOCIN:
Okay, M&Ms are owned by the Mars Family, IDIOTOCIN:
TNT is owned by Turner Broadcasting System, whose CEO is John K Martin, and president is David Levy… … okay, I can’t read any of the other ones, but you get my point. No one’s hiding behind logos. Logos are just nicer to look at than some schmuck’s name. FRESHTASTICAL:
This is their world, and their most valuable resource is not in the ground. It is us. We build their cities. We run their machines. We fight their wars. Before you were saying we were taught not to make a difference, but this sounds like making a difference to me. We build “their cities,” that people can then live in. We run, “their machines”… how vague of a description is that? We “run their machines,” ooh, machines, how sinister!
(Terminator 2 riff) The war one is really the only one you can argue is actually bad, since y’know, you’re fighting a war that you might not necessarily believe in. But if you wanna avoid that, then just don’t join the military. After all, money isn’t what drives them. it’s power. Money is simply the tool they use to control us. You know the elite use money to buy things too, right? That’s not just a thing us peasants do. Everyone uses money. Hell, the reason people have so much power is because of all the money they have. Worthless pieces of paper we depend on to feed us, move us, entertain us. You gotta thing against currency? What, would you prefer we went back to trading? They gave us money, and in return, we gave them the world. Where there were trees that cleaned our air, are now factories that poison it. Oh, those foodless trees don’t seem so useless now, do they? Where there was water to drink, is toxic waste that stinks. What a biting criticism: It stinks. Where animals ran free, are factory farms where they are born and slaughtered endlessly, for our satisfaction. We’ve been killing animals for food since long before factory farms were a thing. And we’re far from the only species that eats other animals. Now if you wanna argue about the treatment of animals in these farms, yeah, that’s a bit of a bigger concern. Over a billion people are starving, despite us having enough food for everybody. Where does it all go? 70% of the grain we grow is fed to the animals you eat for dinner. We should be using this grain for our food, but instead, we’re using it for our food. Why help the starving? You can’t profit off them. Or it’s difficult to regularly send large amounts of food to faraway lands. We are like a plyug (plague) sweeping the Earth, tearing apart the very environment that allows us to live. We see everything as something to be sold, as an object to be owned. But what happens when we have polluted the last river, poisoned the last breath of air, have no oil for the trucks that bring us our food? When will we realize money can’t be eaten, that it has no value? HOMER:
Aw, twenty dollars? I wanted a peanut. HOMER’S BRAIN:
Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts! HOMER:
Explain how! HOMER’S BRAIN:
Money can be exchanged for goods and services. We aren’t destroying the planet, we’re destroying all life on it. Really? All of the life? Listen, no matter how bad we get, we are not nearly powerful enough to destroy all the life on this planet, or even most of it. Especially if what you say turns out to be true, and we’re one step away from killing off our own species. Life’s gonna carry on regardless of what we do. Every year, thousands of species go extinct, and time is running out before we’re next. If you live in America, there’s a 41% chance you’ll get cancer. Heart disease will kill 1 out of 3 Americans. We take prescription drugs to deal with these problems, but medical care is the third-leading cause of death, behind cancer and heart disease. Just, don’t treat your cancer or your heart disease, I guess. We’re told everything can be solved, by throwing money at scientists, so they can discover a pill to make our problems go away, but the drug companies and cancer societies rely on our suffering to make a profit. We think we’re running for a cure, but really we’re running away from the cause. I mean, wouldn’t we want to run away from the cause of cancer? Our body is a product of what we consume, and the food we eat is designed purely for profit. Yeah, the FDA is a for-profit organization. Also, start a GARDEN. We fill ourselves with toxic chemicals That’s not what toxic means! the bodies of animals infested with drugs and diseases. But we don’t see this. Nobody thinks McDonald’s is healthy. It is synonymous with junk food. The small group of corporations that own the media don’t want us to. Yeah, the news never reports whenever anything bad happens in the fast food industry. I mean, look at this guy. You can practically hear the words, [imitating the voice of a newscaster]
“Do you know what’s going into the food you eat?” coming out of his mouth. FRESHTASTICAL:
Surrounding us with a fantasy, we’re told is reality. No, lipstick, cows, Honey Nut Cheerios, open-top cars, running shoes, and Coke are all real. It’s funny to think humans once thought the Earth was the center of the universe, but then again, now we see ourselves as the center of the planet. Bruh. We point to our technology, and say we’re the smartest. But do our computers, cars, and factories really illustrate how intelligent we are? Or do they show how lazy we’ve become? Before you were saying we were all slaving away, day in, day out, until we’re too old to work, now you’re saying we’re lazy? We put this civilized mask on, but when you strip that away, what are we? You’re one of those people who wanted the Joker to win in The Dark Knight, aren’t you? How quickly we forget only within the past hundred years did we allow woman to vote, allow blacks to live as equals. So the world’s gotten better then? Things are better now than they were before. That kind of seems to be the opposite of what you’ve been trying to say here. We act as if we’re all-knowing beings, yet there’s much we fail to see. Funny you show the Christ the Redeemer statue when you say this, because people who worship Christ are typically of the opinion that God is the only all-knowing being Religion generally comes with the admission that we aren’t all-knowing. We walk down the street ignoring the little things: The eyes who stare… How can the eyes be staring if we’re all ignoring each other? the stories they share Well I’m sorry I don’t wanna know the life story of every stranger I pass by on the sidewalk. seeing everything as a background to “me” Perhaps we fear we’re not alone Perhaps we fear we’re not alone
(sound jarbles) OTHER VOICE:
You. Are not. Alone. (jarbling ceases) My name is General Zod. (sound jarbles shortly) … that we’re part of a much bigger picture. but we fail to make the connection. We’re okay killing pigs, cows, chickens, strangers from foreign lands One of these things is not like the other. Also, were we ever not okay with doing that? but not our neighbors, not our dogs or cats, those we’ve come to love and understand. We call other creatures stupid, yet we point to them to justify our actions. Boxing is the example you use for this? What do you have against boxing? It’s a game! They’re not actually trying to harm each other, it’s a game! It’s a sport! They’re okay with it! Nobody has to box if they don’t want to! But does killing simply because we can, because we always have, make it right? Or does it show how little we’ve learned? Well, it would appear we’ve learned quite a lot actually. The rate of battle deaths in armed conflicts is the lowest it’s ever been, pretty much. There’s a slight uptick since 2010, but uh, that’s nowhere near as bad as it was in the late 1990s, and that’s not even comparable to how bad it was in the early 1980s, and THAT’S not as bad as it was in the early 1970s, and THAT’S not as bad as it was in the late 1940s to 1950! There actually was a point in 1955 where we were doing almost as well as we are today, 1955 of course being the year where Marty McFly traveled back in time in Back to the Future. Now I’m not saying Marty McFly is singlehandedly responsible for world peace, BUT look at the data. One day, the sensation we call life will leave us. Our bodies will rot, our valuables recollected. Yesterday’s actions all that remain Death constantly surrounds us Ah, here’s the homicide rates in the United States, and in various parts of Western Europe. still it seems so distant from our everyday reality. We live in a world on the verge of collapse The wars of tomorrow will have no winners, for violence will never be the answer. It will destroy every possible solution. If we all look at our innermost desire, we will see our dreams are not so different. We share a common goal: Happiness. We tear the world apart looking for joy, without ever looking within ourselves. The real Industrial Revolution was inside you all along. Many of the happiest people are those who own the least, but are we really so happy with our iPhones – You gotta point there buddy, the iPhone’s really overrated. our big houses, our fancy cars? IDIOTOCIN (faintly in the background):
Oh, it’s so sad. They’re using phones. FRESHTASTICAL:
We’ve become disconnected, idolizing people we’ve never met. IDIOTOCIN:
When IDIOTOCIN:
have IDIOTOCIN:
we IDIOTOCIN:
not IDIOTOCIN:
done that? We witness the extraordinary on screens, but ordinary everywhere else. Sounds to me like these screens are providing us with something we wouldn’t otherwise get. Thank you, screens. We wait for someone to bring change, without ever thinking of changing ourselves. Presidential elections might as well be a coin toss, it’s two sides of the same coin. I wonder what this guy thought of the 2016 election? That’s not a criticism I’m genuinely curious. Alright, so he’s got one video about Trump, but none about the election in genera- heeeeeey, lookit that. Maybe you and I aren’t so different afterall. We choose which face we want, and the illusion of choice, of change is created. But the world remains the same. But the world remains the same.
IDIOTOCIN:
Wooooooah, look at that morph. We fail to realize the politicians don’t serve us, they serve those who fund them into power. We need leaders, not politicians. But in this world of followers, Oh my god, they are cheering. They are cheering for a game, what is wrong with that? – we have forgotten to lead ourselves. Stop waiting for change, and be the change you wanna see. We didn’t get to this point by sitting on our asses. The human race survived not because we are the fastest, or the strongest, but because we worked together. Really, because you seem to think we were better off when we were prancing about in the forest, doing whatever we wanted, beholden to nothing else and no one else. We have mastered the act of killing, now let’s master the joy of living. This isn’t about saving the planet. The planet will be here, whether we are or not. Hey, that’s what I was saying earlier. Earth has been around for billions of years, each of us will be lucky to last 80. We are a flash in time, but our impact is forever. So are we insignificant, and the Earth will continue on without us, or do we have a massive impact on the Earth that’ll last forever? Which one is it, I’m confused. I often wish I lived in an age before computers, I often wish I lived in an age before computers,
IDIOTOCIN:
Hey look, it’s the guy. I often wish I lived in an age before computers, when we didn’t have screens to distract us, but I realize there’s one reason, why this is the only time I wanna be alive. Because here today, we have an opportunity we never had before. The internet gives us the power to share a message, and unite millions around the world. IDIOTOCIN:
Woah, getting pretty ambitious with that view count there. To be fair, apparently you actually did get that many views on this video, and then some. But still, you didn’t know that when you were uploading this thing. Took a shot in the dark on that one. Not like I’m in much of a position to judge though, I’m probably gonna get like, 10 views on this thing, and 3 of them will be from me just making sure the video works. While we still can we must use our screens, to bring us closer together, rather than farther apart. Is that not already what we’re using them for? Yeah, when you show all these clips of people on their phones, yeah they look dumb, because from an outside point of view it looks like they’re just staring at some stupid rectangle, but that’s only because you can’t see what it is they’re looking at. They’re probably using that phone to communicate with someone else, to connect with them. For better or worse, our generation will determine the future of life on this planet. That’s true for every generation. We can either continue to serve the system of destruction, until no memory of our existence remains, or we can wake up [BASS BOOST] realize we aren’t evolving upwards, but rather falling down. We just have screens in our faces, so we don’t see where we’re heading. Jesus dude, will you cool it with the fucking screens? People are now, more than ever, able to see the direction that society is going in, thanks to those screens. Do you really think that we had a better idea of the state of the world, back when we got our news from some monk reading out a letter he got from some dude who took a month carrying it on horseback, after it spent six months on a boat carrying it away from the monk who actually wrote it? Right now someone could sneeze in Argentina, and you could know about it the minute it happened, because you can watch it on a screen. This present moment is what every step, every breath, and every death has led to. We are the faces of all who came before us – IDIOTOCIN:
Oh man, does that include the Nazis? I don’t want the Nazis’ faces to be part of my face. Can I – can I not have that? Can I opt out of Naziface? Now it is our turn. You can choose to carve your own path, or follow the road countless others have already taken. Life is not a movie, the script isn’t already written. IDIOTOCIN:
Oh yeah, nevermind about those nukes, we were just joshing about those. FRESHTASTICAL:
We are the writers. This is your story, (confused grunt) their story, (impressed grunt) our story. [SOVIET NATIONAL ANTHEM PLAYS] [“no signal” tone] This video, is actually not that bad, despite my poking fun at it. I found out about it because an account I follow on Instagram of all places shared it on their story a while ago, claiming it would “change the way you see the world,” and it really isn’t anything like that. It brings up a few good points, namely: pollution, deforestation, how the education system doesn’t really prepare you that well for your future, how a small fraction of people have the most money, world hunger, people not being able to find happiness despite technically being well-off, hell, even “people use their phones too much” is an idea with some truth behind it. But those are put alongside so much other fluff, and the whole thing is so overdramatic. The video just sort of lumps together every played-out argument for why like, society, maaaan, is bad, and how everything was better, “back in the day,” and a lot of the arguments end up contradicting one another because of it. This guy sees the problems that have been brought about by some modern advancements and it leads him to the conclusion that all of modern society is worse off than it was before, and the whole thing needs to be done away with, instead of just improving upon what we have. It’s throwing the baby out with the bathwater. He seems to think that we used to live in this whimsical utopia before “The Man” came along, and I don’t think he realizes just how much better things have gotten for us. Still, the video’s ultimate message is, “Be the change you wanna see in the world, don’t just do things because that’s what everyone else is doing,” which I can get behind, even if I don’t agree with the various arguments it makes along the way. (dammit I forgot to put outro music)

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Reader Comments

  1. kaloncpu57

    "I'm probably gonna get like 10 views on this thing. Three of them will be from me just making sure the video works."
    Relatable. Gave me a chuckle.

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